Tag Archives: Consequences

I am rotting in this rut of mine.

22 May

I’ve been in this horrible rut for almost 2 weeks.

I want to eat bars of chocolate, stuff my face with chips, and drink coffee like there’s no tomorrow.

I’m tired, stressed, uninspired. It’s quite annoying really.

I’ve felt like this before and usually I’ll snap out of it but this time is different. It’s like I’m set on destroying myself piece by piece.

No matter what I clean or cook or how many times I get up to go to the gym I just keep falling back down.

Maybe it’s the weather. Maybe it’s lack of sleep. Maybe it’s the stress and uncertainty.

Maybe, I need to suck it up and pull myself together.

Bills? Paid, almost.

26 Mar

Dear tax return, thank you.

We were able to pay our cable, water, electricity, and phone bills. You sexy thang you. We were even lucky enough to save some of our pawned possessions.

We had the chance to eat out and not stress over the bill (still under $60 for four). I even got some comfy flats and new flip flops!

Thanks again tax return. You really helped us get on track. We’re not quite there yet but getting closer every damn day.

Live, love, laugh. Actually laugh a lot. Stress kills and gives you wrinkles. Trust me, my face is proof people.

Why can’t there be calm before more calm?

15 Mar

My water was shut off. I have no gas. I feel like a shit parent because I’m so stressed. I have a couple of dollars left in my bank account and won’t be seeing a paycheck or tax refund until the end of March.

That’s a whole lot of surviving with two kids on $2. I feel as though I’m stuck in this huge, deep hole of endless consequences that’s just consuming me ever so slowly.

I keep telling myself to breathe. It’s just not enough anymore.